2021, travels, + reflections.

2021 was the year that I stopped and looked at my accumulated experiences and travels, laid them out all in front of me, picked each one of them up like old photos from your childhood, and reflected what the time from that moment until now has meant, and all I can say is that I have lived out my dream. This blog and my YouTube channel have only captured a small part of it, but the road here has been filled with wild adventures and travels. Sometimes we do not realize we are living out our dreams till we take a step back, and as I look back, I marvel with gratitude for all the adventures. Each one taught me and led me to the next. Some held deep meanings others were just those magical moments simply meant to be felt and lived.

This year I was still able to travel. There were family trips to Virginia and Cancun. A trip to Dublin, to see my best friend who I had not seen for some time as she gets her masters in International Business (go, tiff). Going to Buffalo, probably not the place people dream of but a trip very much needed to visit a very old friend. There were moments of pure bliss, like returning to Chile, a place that I talk about quite a lot and has managed to embed itself in my heart; it has become my home and moments of heartbreak like leaving that I am not ready to get into details.

Simultaneously, as I reveled in gratitude for the adventures of 2021 and all the ones prior, I was also welcomed with some, let’s say, existential travel questions, if you will. I was confronted with the “traveler identity” that I had cultivated, perfected, and have come to feel a bit disconnected from. We are familiar with that person in our family or friend group. That was/is me. For most, if not all of my 20’s, I felt a rush to go to all the places and experience all the things. That accumulated energy led to the excitement of the “road” disappearing somewhere along the way. The “road,” dare I say, tired me. That is/was a weird feeling to navigate in 2021. The usual excitement of preparing for a trip, going to the airport, or an opportunity to teach in Spain was no longer exciting. I have never felt that before, and for someone who has thrived on all those moments and feelings, it felt scary not to feel the same way I did for a thing I loved. For the first time, this identity became more of a cage than something that had once felt liberating. I am still feeling out of this space and letting go of the idea of who I thought I was and should be. I have found something liberating in that.

My YouTube channel has grown to a community of 312. That number for some is relatively small, but for someone who is very shy and did not think she would be able to put out that first video, that number is quite a big achievement. I want to explore more topics on my Youtube channel that still have to do with travel and life abroad. So much of travel is learning perspectives and ways of life, and I want to share those thoughts and pose questions. I want to develop my storytelling skills and pull away from some of the past videos I have done.

As 2022 approaches, I enter it with many things up in the air. The year to come can take so many different routes, and the what-ifs are endless, something very new for a person who likes to have the next thing figured out. I won’t know the direction 2022 will take until the first couple of weeks, so stay tuned, but till then, I enter 2022 slowly, adjusting to my surroundings. I am in no rush anymore. If anything, that is what travel and life abroad have taught me to slow it down a bit, enjoy the slow mornings, and the trips to the feria.

I am also looking forward to liking travel again. It seems silly, but I fell out of love with it this year. So I am excited to get to know myself, the type of travel I want to do now, and this version of Ashely. I am excited to build this relationship with myself and my passions. We will get to know each other but slowly, this time. It will be a relationship that is free of an expiration date.

I have more reflections to share regarding travel, life abroad, but that is all in its time; till then, happy new year.