Dealing With Loss and Grief While Being Abroad

When I set out to make videos and write posts about life abroad, it was to share what navigating life abroad looks like—a transparent account of all of the adventures, challenging moments, and sometimes the heartbreaking.

Moving abroad, I always knew the possibility of getting that phone call of something that happened back home. In preparing to move abroad, we don’t consider or give much thought to loss or grief, but you have to be aware of it.

The call no one wants.

That phone call occurred during my last week in Chile (which is a whole emotional rollercoaster on its own). My beloved great-aunt, the matriarch of our family, the glue, was tragically killed in a car accident. Navigating the loss of a loved one away from family is difficult. Although I am not new to loss and grief, I am new to it from abroad.

There is something about being with your family during moments like these. The grief because bearable. There are things to do, phone calls to make. But being abroad, I found myself alone. No one near me knew her, who could share my pain, have the same memories as me. I was there to grieve her from afar.

But in that space, I learned how to navigate it. I won’t say I am an expert, and frankly, I hope not to be but here is what helped the days pass, and if you find yourself in a similar situation ( and I hope you never do), maybe this will help.

Some tips in dealing with grief

• Staying present as much as possible helps keep your feet on the ground.
• Crying is good too, like really good. If you can find it in you to laugh, it works wonders.
• Telling stories and memories to people who have never met them but are willing to listen is healing.
• Do what you can from abroad. ( I made her tribute video because I  love making videos, but even more so, it felt like I could be of support and contribute even from afar.)

Grief is a heavy thing, and being away doesn’t make it easier.
This experience is not unique to me, especially this past year where families couldn’t fly for months to say goodbye.  For those who have been through something similar, my heart is with you, especially during a time when we were forced to be apart.

En fin.

She would have wanted us to continue with life, live it calmly and to the fullest, and with some cafecito and something dulce.